It is never easy...

Just when I get done with kids school and take a deep breath - Good old God throws a curve ball. I found out yesterday that both my kids will be combo classes at Las Brisas - now that is not the end of the world and Isabella will have Mrs. Willis again and she did learn alot this past year. Both kids will be the youngest in the combo class, which I guess is good.
But then I get woke up out of a deep sleep last night and all these things are going through my head. It is tight financially for us to send the kids there, we do it but it means we don't have a ton of rainy day money ( and that was a problem in Jan when it was raining). I work so we can send the kids to private school but if I would still have to work even if they didn't go there due to the cost of bananas and gas on the rise.
So I get up this am and call the school district (okay side note...I work in corp relocation and apparantly when we purchased this house in Wildomar CA, I did not look into the school district which is something I would recommend my transferee's do...ugh!).... so our home school may or may not become a title one school (which sounds yuck to me but my aunt who is a teacher said that is good). I am going to enroll them and see if I can get a intraschool transfer to Coal Canyon in Murrieta which just was rated 10. Donald Graham just was rated a 7. I did mention it to Isabella to get her reaction and she is such a blessing, she was open to it and said "mom I can meet new friends", that made me feel so much better. We went over to the school and the principal showed us around, it is so very different then Las Brisas.

I need prayers from everyone for me not to worry and that it will work out, whatever is suppose to happen.

I have such mixed emotions. While I want my kids exposed to diversity since the real world is filled with it, I also love the protection, love and support they get at Las Brisas. I worked hard this year to help build the PTF with Cami and so proud of what we did, and feel if I walk away now I might be a quitter. But then I turn to the financial part - the relocation business is tied to homesale and my bonus is not even enough this month to fill my car with gas. Mike's work has slowed down so much and it is scary and it might be that we just can't afford $1000.00 a month tuition.... Then I think how selfish are you - get a night job at Target and then I think - who will make dinner and do homework if I am at work at night - UGH!!!

I am just going to give it to the Lord and ask for guidance, I know that we are not to live strapped and with the economy the way it is, and construction slowing down, Mike is going to continue to work less and not more. And I just can't count on the Lottery that I think I might win!!!

Both kids were so cute and when we got home, Isabella said "wow that place looks cool" and then I went upstairs and cried.... I know they will be fine there but the problem with that is I HATE the word FINE!! I hate that they won't be at school with their cousins - that is a hard one too.

I think the biggest thing is I want it to be my decision and not one that is forced. I have time since public school starts August 13th and Las Brisas doesn't start until September.

Just keep praying for me to relax and let God do his work.